Food Fight!
by LexiLex24
Summary: Ilana and Lance have a dispute involving eggs, soda, and a whole lot of batter. First M rated fic. If hot, steamy, sloppy dry humping action offends you, back away while you can. For all you food fetish readers out there, this is your lucky day.


Okay, I know I haven't written anything in a long time(feel free to hate me), but I'm gonna take my best shot at this idea that just came to mind. I've never written an M rated story before, so honest yet constructive criticism would be appreciated.

Also, if there were specific lines or parts you enjoyed I'd love to hear your opinion.

Well, enough of hearing what I have to say, on with the messy food related lemon! (Although it will probably be more like a lime)

disclaimer: I do not own Sym-Bionic Titan

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Lance sat sprawled out on the living room couch staring the television down like a couch potatoesque zombie. He was completely oblivious to the harmony of ingredient bags being torn open, beaters whirring as they mixed them, and the alien beauty bringing all of these things to life with her hands.

Ilana hummed a melodious tune as she continued her intricate but rewarding endeavor to create;

What were they called again? Cupcakes?

She picked up the recipe tag off the flour covered kitchen counter and double checked to make sure she was following the proper procedures. She quickly dusted off the card so the print could become legible again.

" Sugar, eggs, 1/2 cup of water..." she muttered to herself. Just then Lance had snapped out of his lifeless state of mind long enough to trudge into the area Ilana was currently using as bakery central to get himself a soda. One thing he noted, earthlings actually contributed to make living there slightly more pleasant.

He glanced at Ilana engrossed in the slip off paper in her hands, and smirked unable to resist the opportunity. He set his unopened drink down on the table very slowly as not to alert her of his presence and quietly crept towards her back.

When he finally arrived just a few inches away from her back he paused before she could feel his breath on the nape of her elegant swan-like neck.

He swiftly but gently covered her eyes with his rough masculine hands.

" Guess wh-ooof! "

Lance was unable to complete this thought as he felt a sharp pain pin point his abdomen.

Ilana had elbowed him in his stomach.

" Ah geez! Ilana your stronger than you look!" he exclaimed cradling his rock hard abs as he doubled over slightly. He had been hurt worse than this of course and had the scars to prove it. But it was really the surprise that got him.

Ilana was breathing heavily as if she actually thought Lance was attacking her a few moments ago. She had finally regained her composure and responded to his quip as such...

" Lance! What are you trying to do kill me?!" she spat cheeks flushed from excitement. Lance had changed after they first landed on earth. He had gone from being her cold and calculating bodyguard to just plain old nosy and quirky Lance. He was slowly becoming more playful and lighthearted around the princess and began treating her as a friend rather than and assignment.

Although he sometimes got carried away with it, this for example.

Lance scoffed and put his hands in his pockets nonchalantly with his eyes closed. " I was just having a little fun" he answered. " Don't get your way too short shorts in a bunch."

Ilana on the other hand had started dressing as to how this planet's current fashion dictated. She still loved wearing bright and cheery colors, but what they adorned were starting to get more and more...

Revealing.

Ilana pouted angrily and looked down at her dirty pink and daisy spotted apron she lifted and looked down at her green "walking around the house" shorts and saw the leg parts rolling up her inner thighs making them resemble a bikini bottom.

" They are NOT too short! They are just the right size for someone of my age and figure." she stated proudly. " Whatever" Lance waved her off and noticed what she had been looking at earlier. He picked up the recipe for , again what were they? Cupcakes right?

" Hey, I was reading that." Lance just ignored her. " Lance." Again he didn't respond. " Lance." This time she reached for for the card and missed thanks to Lance's military honed reflexes.

She knew Lance was just pretending to be interested in what she was reading to work her nerves and get back at her for the elbow to his stomach.

She had to admit, it was working.

" Magic word?" he said in his cool calm voice.

Ilana was about to say something, but just then realized he still had his drink sitting on the table. Yet to be opened.

This brought a smile to her freckled face.

" Soda."

Lance raised one of his thick eyebrows and turned around to question her and was met with a face full of sticky carbonated beverage. He had dropped the card he was using to tease her at this point and held both of his arms out as if that would protect him from the sugary geyser. Once the soda ran out, there was nothing left but an empty can, a soaking wet corporal and a scared princess slowly backing away from him. Her smug grin disappeared and was traded up for a nervous expression.

That's right Ilana, be afraid. Be _very_ afraid.

As quickly as Ilana thought to make a run for it was just as fast as Lance had grabbed a raw egg form the counter and hurled it at the girl he was supposed to be protecting from harm. " Lance!" she said as she attempted to wipe the yellow substance off her chest. However the way she kept batting at it only served to slosh it around on her small amount of cleavage that was peeking out of her powder blue tank top.

And Lance noticed.

_" Oh wow". _he thought. He observed as Ilana tried to regain some of her dignity by rubbing her own breasts with her bare hands but only served to diminish it further when she took her apron off and continued to try and flick off the slime that was now making her shirt see through. With eyes like an eagle, Lance focused on her boobs and saw what he could make out as a sheek shiny light purple bra with a small bow in the middle._ "I never knew Ilana was so...sexy!" _he pondered in nefarious pleasure. What was he thinking? She was the princess of an entire planet for god's sake! But he just couldn't help it. Royalty or not Ilana was still a teenage girl.

And he _was _a teenage boy.

After about forty five seconds of fumbling with her soiled attire she huffed in frustration. "Thanks alot Lance! This is one of my favorite-" she stopped. She finally looked at her brother figure again. And took notice off the slack jawed look on his face and the position of his pupils. And felt her cheeks fill with a fresh rosy blush upon realizing what they were staring at. She let out an embarrassed and shocked "eep" and covered her herself with her small arms. First food fighting now exposing herself? Lance always brought out the worst in her!

Lance had finally snapped out of his lustful trance and came back to his senses. Causing him to blush a shade of pink with shame-

But not regret.

" Ilana I'm sorry, it's just that you're-" again he couldn't finish his that as Ilana had thrown the empty soda can that started this whole ordeal at his face. " Ah! Ilana please just- hey!" she wouldn't let him talk as she had now went from tossing empty cans to condiments. Lance managed to dodge or catch most of what she could toss at him but everything else stained his wet sticky blue shirt with a spicy powder Ilana had now made her way from one corner of the kitchen to the counter Lance was still stationed at, grabbing the bowl of sweet sweet batter she had once been entirely devoted to mixing.

Which she now devoted to pouring down the front of Lance's pants.

" Ugh! Eww!" Lance squirmed in discomfort as he gently shoved Ilana away from him and felt the batter make it's way down his pant legs and drip onto the tiled floor. Ilana simply "hmphed" at his plight that she inflicted on him.

" That'll teach you and that little "friend" of yours to objectify me."

Before Ilana could walk out of the sloppy war zone with her head held high she felt a weight on her wrist hold her back. before she knew it she found herself flung against Lance's muscular and still very sticky chest. She tried to jerk her way out of his hold but he would not have it.

" Lance, let go." He ignored her yet again. And the bowl of what was was left of the mistreated batter found it's way into the wrong hands. Again.

" Payback" was all Lance stated as he backed Ilana against the side of the fridge to hold her in place as he used two fingers on his right hand to pull out the low collar of her tank top and pour the remains of oozy batter down her shirt with the other. Ilana gasped quietly and began to cringe in disgust. Although it was probably meant as cringing it sounded more to him like... Moaning? Probably just his perverted side getting the best of him.

Lance tossed the big pink plastic bowl on the floor and watched with a mocking grin on his face as Ilana squirmed her petite body uncomfortably while the slimy goo made it's way between her breasts down her flat stomach, and slid down into parts unmentioned.

" Lance..." she crooned with one eye open.

" Sorry but I had to get you to listen one way or a another. I didn't mean to look at you in that way it's just, you're so beautiful. There i said it! I couldn't help it. I mean I would never take advantage of you, I'm supposed to be protecting you. You just looked so- he began to sweat hoping what he was about to say next wouldn't earn him more food down his jeans." -hot with that raw egg seeping into your clothes and even now you look amazing with batter all up and down your, ... amazing body and, and,... uh..." he trailed off and ended up staring at her like he did a few minutes ago. She was in fact still dripping with batter which you could now see through her shirt and front of her short shorts which with all the movements she was doing had found their way up her behind revealing the bottom half of her toned, plump buttocks.

Lance was at a loss for words when she started taking strides toward him with a spark of pure desire in her amber golden eyes as she looked into his. Lance was backing away from her until he found himself against the sink. He recoiled as she looked at his face for a few seconds.

" Wh-what is i-it Ilana?" he stuttered nervously. She just chuckled and continued her lustful examination for a couple seconds she finally whispered in his ear.

" I forgot your eyes were green."

Just then she felt a pair of strong hands take her by the waist and roll her over to change positions he hoisted her up on the counter and took a moment to look at her.

" I forgot your eyes were golden."

With that, they began making out furiously, Ilana's hands went to his full soft black hair and ruffled it wildly, while his slid down to her hips and rested themselves on her tight round ass. Lance begged for entrance to her mouth with his tongue and was granted it in a matter of seconds. Ilana felt her body temperature rise, especially down near her nether regions. Which was now on fire. Lance felt a hard bulge in his pants along with a rhythmic throbbing sensation that seemed to follow suit with the raging beat of his heart. The same sentence rang through both of their minds as they gave into their urges.

_" This is so wrong, but it's sooo HOT!" _

He raised his right hand from her butt for second and she was about to break the wet kiss to protest but changed her mind when she felt it come back down with excessive force causing a loud smack. Lance had just spanked her.

She gasped loudly arching her back and let an aroused moan escape into the ceiling. Lance smirked seeing the normally reserved and uptight princess acting like such a- bad girl. " Like that huh?" Lance asked teasingly. Ilana then realized what she just did and shifted her head back in place to look at her bodyguard recently turned lover. She blushed deep red in shame and looked down at her batter covered thighs.

She did in fact "like" it, very much so.

She first noticed it when a couple of girls on her soccer team would give her a playful slap on her behind while she was changing after a particularly good game. It was their way of saying "job well done". Although she knows she shouldn't have, she felt very good whenever they did it and would shyly thank them with a blush on her dotted cheeks and say it wasn't necessary. But on the inside, she was tingling with forbidden pleasure. Something that made her think she was becoming dirty and impure.

Lance saw this and tilted her head up with his finger.

" You don't have to feel bad Ilana, everyone has a kink, even if they are royalty." he said comfortably massaging the one of the thighs she was just staring at.

Ilana stared at him hopefully "Really?" she squeaked shyly. " Yeah really." he said in a girly voice imitating her causing her to giggle. " I for one loved seeing you covered in slimy, slippery foods." he shamelessly admitted. " And you-"

_Smack!_

Another resolute swat to her ass caused another loud moan to rise out of her esophagus as well as a red mark in the shape of Lance's hand to form on her left butt cheek. " Love a good spanking." he finished.

She decided he was right and went back to making out with him. Their tongues danced around and probed each other's mouths. Ilana got more adventurous and began to lift Lance's shirt.

" It's still covered ...mm... with soda. You really ...mm...shouldn't be wearing it ...mm...anymore." she got out between his kisses. He accepted her lame excuse and helped her take off his soiled shirt revealing his sweet pecs and six packs and those muscular arms of his.

_" Oh man! No wonder why the girls in school drool over him 24/7. How can anyone resist all of this?"_ she thought as she traced a finger along his chest and abs lingering on a few battle scars. She had seen Lance shirtless before, but most of those times she was either trying to pry him away from his workout routine to help her with something, or had found themselves in an urgent situation. She had always known he was an attractive boy but never really had the chance to appreciate it. It all seemed to be coming to the light now.

Apparently, Lance thought they should both be shirtless since it wasn't fair Ilana got to see him half naked all the time. He began to lift her tank top and she raised her arms to help him. He tossed it to the side of the counter along with his shirt. He saw her bosom in all their glory covered by the sleek purple bra he saw through earlier. (if only that raw egg was alive so he could thank it) He also observed what was flowing out of it and identified it as the cupcake batter that made the gorgeous young blonde look all the more sexy.

Without a second thought he dived his face into her breasts causing her to look very shocked at the sudden impact. But she made no motion to stop him. In fact, when his limber tongue began to lap up the sugary goo that filled the cups she used her slender fingers to grab his raven hair and push his flawless face further into her perky tits.

Ilana's toned sexy legs wrapped around his waist and she began to gyrate the bottom half of her body to cause friction between their two covered areas. Lance himself was amazed that Ilana knew how to do such a thing and groaned from satisfaction right into her tasty boobs. As Ilana continuously worked her hips around on the counter and against his erect member.

_" I'll have to thank Kimmy for teaching me how to... twerk I think she called it."_

As things kept getting hotter and heavier, they both realized they had to stop eventually.

Especially when they heard the door slam open.

" Hello! Anyone home?"

Lance and Ilana broke away from each other and shared the same annoyed yet worried look.

" Barb" they both said.

As quietly as they could, Ilana got off the kitchen counter as Lance backed off of her and recovered his shirt as he tossed her's in her direction, she caught it and immediately started slipping it back on while Lance did the same.

" Hey ther-" Barb didn't continue noticing the scattered mess in the kitchen and the two teenagers looking in different directions with guilty looks on both of their faces.

"Well, what happened here." Barb asked in her normal nosy neighbor tone of voice.

Ilana bit her lip and looked down blushing obviously not wanting to tell her the truth or lie about either. Lance however just licked his lips of the remaining batter from her bra.

" Isn't it obvious? We're making cupcakes."

* * *

Well, there's that. I tried to make it as hot as I could while still keeping the characters in character. I hope this was a good read for you and remember reviews are love.

See ya!


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